Posted:   July 3, 2011



I expected this to be one of the best nights of my life. Nathan was due here any moment. I was going to show him the surprise I got him. It took some doing but I arranged for Nathan and myself to have a romantic experience up north for Christmas. Nathan had always been complaining that we never got to see much of each other.

I called some friends over and told Nathan to come by later, after he put his brother to bed. Kris was such a great guy, very energetic, but it was hard to be his friend, he was always on the computer. Nathan entered the house around eleven o’clock, after about 30 minutes it was time to present my boyfriend with his present.

James, my best friend, threw his beer can against the wall to get the crowds attention. “Shut up guys. Derek here wants to talk.”

“Thanks, James. Nathan, tonight is one of your lucky nights.”

A buzzed Nathan said, “Why? You going to fuck me right here?”

The room laughed. “No! Idiot!” I got down on one knee, and tied my shoe.

“Love, you have been complaining I never got you anything. Here.”

When Nathan opened up the gift package and saw the experience he ran up and kissed me passionately on the lips.

Seeing his happy face was one of the best moments I could ask for. The last four years have been some of the best times of my life. Meeting Nathan, falling in love with his brother, Kris, and watching the squirt grow up, and then proposing to him just last weekend.

We ended the kiss, and Nathan said,


As the night went on into the party, Nathan got drunk as his friends left. But I just wanted Nathan drunk because our sex was so much better.

When the door closed behind the last of his friends, Nathan turned to me with a smile on his face and a look in his eye that told me what was about to happen. I didn’t even have time to react before Nathan had me pinned back against the wall, attacking my neck with his lips.

His lips felt so good, his tongue running along my jaw line. I shuddered under the touch. It was amazing. After all the times we’d been together Nathan still got me excited and still made me feel as good as the day those lips first kissed me.

I grabbed his head and kissed him passionately, pulling him to me until I could feel his hard cock pressing against mine. I couldn’t take it any longer, I had to get his clothes off.

Without breaking the kiss I reached up between our bodies to unbutton his shirt as fast as I could, taking the opportunity to run my hands over his hot body as I slid the shirt from his shoulders. I would have ripped it off him but I always thought he looked so sexy in it so I didn’t want to damage it. He clearly didn’t think the same of mine as he ripped it open and pulled it from my body so roughly it almost hurt.

His lips went back to work on my neck, nibbling and sucking on the skin, marking me as his, as he worked open the button and zip on my pants. They were around my ankles within seconds and I quickly kicked them off and stepped out of them. I was so hard and it didn’t go unnoticed.

Nathan dropped to his knees in front of me, ripped off my favourite boxers and swallowed my cock whole. I was still amazed by how easy he found it to deep throat my cock, but then he’d had plenty of practice.

Every part of his mouth worked my cock to perfection; his lips, his tongue, the muscles in his throat when the head of my cock slid down it. I was literally gripping the wall to keep myself upright

This was why Nathan was so good when he was drunk. He seemed to lose all his inhibitions and his gag reflex. There was nothing he couldn’t and wouldn’t do. I was on the verge of cumming within minutes and Nathan must have felt it because he pulled his face off my dick and putting his hands on my hips, he forced me to turn around, put his hand in the middle of my back and pushed me forward so my head was resting against the wall.

I heard the rustling of him losing the rest of his clothes behind me but I didn’t have time to turn around to look at the sexiest man I’d ever seen because I threw my head back and screamed feeling his face bury itself between my ass cheeks as his tongue started probing my hole.

I was moaning so loud, but it didn’t matter and I didn’t care. I was clawing at the walls with the feelings Nathan was causing in my ass. There was nothing I wanted more at that minute than for him to slip inside me and fuck my brains out.

Just like before when I felt I was about to cum, Nathan could read my body perfectly and could tell I was ready because before I could say anything I heard him spit and slowly rise up my body, licking his way up my back, until he reached my neck and his hard dick made contact with my ass and quickly pushed inside.

There was no condom. We hadn’t used one in years. We were both safe and exclusive and it felt so much better, closer, like we owned each other and no one else would ever split us up.

Nathan quickly went to work on my ass, pounding in to me, crushing me against the wall. He was so aggressive, but at the same time so gentle. He was fucking me roughly, but instead of feeling pain, I felt nothing but pleasure as I backed in to him, forcing his cock deeper in to me.

After another minute of this Nathan pulled out of me, spat on his cock to lube it some more and spun me back around. He pinned me against the wall, for a deep, passionate kiss, before picking me up, wrapping my legs around his waist and driving his dick back in to me.

He held me up, my back against the wall, my legs around his waist and arms around his shoulders. He was pounding me up against the wall so hard I was afraid it wouldn’t hold our weight much longer, but even if it did collapse, I wouldn’t care because Nathan’s bare dick felt so good inside me. There was nothing better than having the man I love fuck my brains out.

His dick moved back and forth so quickly, so smoothly, it was like my ass and his dick were made for each other. He just glided in to me, driving it deep and pulling back until just the head was left in before plunging back inside me. No matter how quick me moved his hips I always felt the full length of his dick, stretching me, hitting my spot constantly so I was always hard and dripping between us.

Even as his cock continued to pummel my ass he kept kissing me deep and passionately, our tongues twisting around each other, every part of our bodies wanting to be as close as possible, to merge in to one. There was so much love between us, even as I was being fucked hard against the wall.

With neither his cock or tongue leaving my body Nathan somehow held up my entire weight and continued to fuck my face and ass as he made his way down the hall toward the bedroom. I was bouncing up and down on his dick, moaning in to his mouth.

I was thrown down on to the bed and for the first time in about five minutes, our mouths parted. Nathan grabbed my ankles from around his waist and held them in his hands, using them to pull me closer as his cock thrust deep inside me.

Then he pushed my legs back, almost folding me in half, my knees resting against my chest so he could really pound me hard. His hips and balls her smacking against my ass so hard I’d probably be bruised in the morning. Nathan was fucking me so hard and deep, with such hunger.

“Oh, fuck me, Nathan. I love you so much. Fuck me!” I screamed.

Nathan smiled a little evil grin and started fucking me even harder. I thought the bed might break, either that or my bones might. I was bent in half with the most amazing man in the world jack hammering his cock in and out of my ass, driving me wild, hitting my spot so perfect that with just a few more thrusts I exploded all over my own chest and face, even catching some in my mouth.

Nathan growled and in less than a minute he was cumming deep inside me, making me his, showing me how much he loved and trusted me. I could never get tired of that feeling, of knowing that the very essence of Nathan was inside me. He might not have been able to make me pregnant but damn how I wanted him to try.

Still hard inside me, Nathan bent down to kiss me passionately, his dick still throbbing and leaking cum. We kissed hard, the cum I’d caught in my mouth and hadn’t yet swallowed was shared between us.

I was sore as hell, but I didn’t care when Nathan had fucked me so good and made me feel so special. Nothing else mattered to me but Nathan’s happiness. He was my world and I would do anything to please him.

So after the rough, painful fuck session; Nathan was still drunk but I was equally drunk and let Nathan leave to go home.

“Hey, love drive safe. “ I called out to him. It wasn’t the first time I let him drive the 10 minute drive in this state. Nathan was always an excellent driver. We both knew the trouble Nathan would get into if he didn’t return.

“I will, you know I'm always a safe driver.”

“Call me when you get home.”

He blew me a kiss and left. I waited for his call but fell asleep.

Three hours later, now sobering up and unable to sleep I realized Nathan never called me, so I tried calling Nathan. Nothing. I got dressed and drove to Nathan’s house and saw the smashed car. I jumped back in to my car and raced to the hospital.

I was worried, crying and extremely concerned. I don’t know what I would do without Nathan. He was my rock, sure we got fucked up together, but at least we had fun. The drive to the hospital was so long, that I was just thinking up one horrific moment after another.

“Hi. I’m looking for Nathan Stanton’s room” I tried to act calmly, when inside I was fucked up so much.

“I have some bad news. He was in accident.”

“I know that!! Where is he?!” I yelled

The nurse at the desk looked extremely sad. “I am sorry. Mr. Stanton died roughly 20 minutes ago.”

I couldn’t handle it I just fell down in shock. The nurse came by and tried to help me up. I pushed her away and sat against the wall. “How…did it happen?”

“I really don’t know, he suffered extreme brain damage in the car accident, the surgeons did their best.”

The tears were rushing, faster and faster and after a few minutes, or hours, I don’t know, I asked the nurse who was still there. “Is the Stanton family still here?”

She nodded; I saw the tears running down her face. “What’s wrong?”

“When I told the family, his younger brother just stood shocked. Then he whispered “I saw the whole thing."

“Where is Kris?” She pointed to the cafeteria and went to him. 

I needed to talk to Kris, needed to comfort him. I walked along the corridor and went into the tiny cafeteria and there was Kris sitting alone. 

I loved the kid so much. I walked closer to Kris. I knew what he must have been feeling. He felt like I did. That it was his fault. As I approached him, I heard him mumbling about it being his fault.

“This is not your fault.” I said in small voice.

Kris’s tear filled blue eyes looked up, “Huh?” Was all the young guy could say.

I put a hand on his shoulder. “Squirt. This is not your fault.”

Kris whispered “I know. IT'S YOUR FAULT! If you hadn't shown him the ways of the world I might still have a fucking brother.”

Kris stood up and punched me in face. He did it again and again. The more he did it, the more power was behind each punch. I stood there and took it. The hurt Kris was feeling was strong, and he needed some way to release it. “YOU FUCKING MORON!! What are you even doing here?”

“Believe it or not Kris. You and your family are not the only people who cared about Nathan. I loved him.”

“This is all your fault. You knew more than anyone how he acts. What he was. If anybody could have changed him, it would have been you. So take your love, take your support and leave. Leave me and my family alone. You caused us so much fucking pain as it is. LEAVE RIGHT NOW!!”

I was about to say something, but I knew Kris wouldn't listen. Why should he? Kris punched me in the face again, with so much force and emotion behind it that I fell to the ground. I got up and left.

I wasn’t about to start something with the Stanton clan. Kris deserved to hit me. I left the hospital and went home. I needed to leave. The apartment reminded me of Nathan too much. I packed a large backpack and left. I left the apartment. I left the city. I left all the emotional ties to Nathan behind and escaped.


I left town after Nathan’s death. I had no reason to stay. I had no where to go. I started walking away. Anywhere I could get away from the guilt I felt. I didn’t take my phone or my car and I didn't leave a message for anybody. I told James I had things to take care of and left it at that. James would understand my need for privacy.

6 days later, I was wearing the same clothes. The blood from Kris’s punches was still there. I had very little money and I slept wherever I could. Each night the nightmares came. Nathan looking as hot as he was the first day I met him. Nathan whispered in my ear. “I loved you so much, Derek. Why did you have to kill me?” I turned and the hot Nathan became a gruesome sight. “You killed me!!” That’s when I would wake up.

After that nightmare, I couldn’t take it so I checked into a local motel next to a church. I stole a knife from the motel restaurant and was about to cut my wrist and end it all. Then I saw the church. I looked at the clock on the wall and realized from attending in my youth that the day’s service had just ended.

I went to the church to speak to somebody. Maybe some religious guidance is the ticket out of this mess. Opening the door I went to the confessional.

A young voice spoke to me. “Tell me your sins, my son.”

“You seem a little young to be a father.” I said.

Then there was some giggling. I decided maybe this wasn’t the right idea after all. I left the confessional and headed to the exit. The kid came out and I grabbed him by the arm.

“I am sorry, Sir. I was just having a little fun. If you want I can get my father, he runs this church.”

Derek looked perplexed. Sir, did this young guy call him sir? 

“What’s your name, son.”

“Hayden Franklin, Sir.”

“You can cut the sir stuff. I'm just Derek.”

“Nice to meet you, Derek.” He stuck out his hand and Derek shook it. “Derek, is there anything I can do for you? You seem like you a little worse for wear.”

For some reason I seemed to want to talk about my feelings with somebody. Anybody would do. This Hayden guy seemed very interested.

“Well, to be honest I have been walking around for the last six days trying to figure out what to do.”


I had no reason to not speak the truth to this kid, who I probably would never see again, “You see my boyfriend died in horrible car crash almost a week ago.”

“I am sorry.”

I looked at Hayden’s eyes, they seemed to so show great sympathy for me. “Thanks. But every day since I have been feeling guilty. You see, he died because of me.”

Hayden arched his eyebrow. “You killed him?”

“No, but I let him get into his car when he was too drunk.”

“I see, well, my father always says we make our own choices. Maybe, your boyfriend just made the wrong choice at the wrong time.”

“Yeah, but I should have done something.”

“Like what?”

“Call a cab or make him stay at my place.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“I was drunk at the time too.”

“I see, had you told your boyfriend, would he have listened to you?”

“No. He was always his own man. He kept bitching about how his brother wanted him change and be careful. But he still didn't listen."

“So this is repeat occurrence?”

“You could say that.”

“Let me ask you this, had he not died in the car crash, would you still feel guilty about letting him drive drunk?”

Fuck. Who is this kid? He seems to be getting at the heart of the matter. Honestly, no, I wouldn’t feel guilty. There would be nothing to feel guilty about. I told Hayden so.

“Ah. You see here, that’s where this line of thinking gets you. When something horrible happens most people place the blame on themselves, regardless of whether they have anything to do with the incident in first place. I am sure everybody around your boyfriend feels at fault.”

“I would imagine.”

“Don’t beat yourself over something we cannot change.”

“You're right. Kid, when did you get to be so smart?”

“I am forced to sit in on my father’s sermons and over time the preaching seeps into my brain. I am happy to help though.” Hayden got up to leave.

“I take it you're not a religious man.”

“I guess you could say that.”

I was able put two and two together. So I asked Hayden, “Are you gay?”

Hayden looked shocked. “Yes, don’t tell me I'm that obvious.”

“Not really, just you didn’t seem to be overly judgmental about me being gay, especially being the son of religious person. And you don’t follow religion.”

I could see Hayden drawing the same conclusion. “I guess when you say it like that.”

“Yeah, I will just throw it out there. Your parents don’t know.”

“Obviously, it would be like telling the Pope he fathered a Muslim child.”

I laughed at the image, and Hayden joined him. “The problem is. I know that as soon as I tell my father that I prefer men to women, he will lose it. He will disown me and pretty much hate me for the rest my life.”

“I take it your mother would see it the same way?”

“Last week she helped my father on the sermon, explaining that men and women are meant to be together and everything else is an abomination. Add to fact it was because of her campaign, that this city won’t allow gays to marry.”

“That is rough. I can see how it would be hard to come out.”

Hayden seemed relieved to talk about it, and at that moment anything to get away from my problems was worth my time.

“It gets worse, they want me to hook up with this girl, Jessica. I tried to hold it back, but so far it hasn’t been working.”

I felt for the kid. “Would your father and mother really think you are the devil, if you turn out gay?”


“Just some free advice. Tell them. They will get mad, and say the some evil things, they might even try to convert you, but in the end they care about you. They will come around in time. Most people do.”

“I don’t know.”

I got up to leave. “Okay, it’s your own funeral.”  I left him pondering his choices. I called over my shoulder. “Thanks, kid you helped me a lot.” But deep down I knew the feelings couldn’t go away with a few magical words.

I left the church, needing to clear my head. I went to the local bar and asked for drink and drink after drink.

“Hey, kid, you alright?”

“I just need to clear my head.”

“Okay, but these things are not cheap.”

“Here, start a tab.” I gave him the credit card and he started the tab.

Christmas came and went without much of anything. I was going to call James and wish him a Merry Christmas, but I decided against it, he would have too many questions. So I spent the next month drinking myself into a stupor.

By New Years Eve I was a regular at the bar. I went in at 4 pm and left at closing time. Max, the bartender, offered to let me spend the nights at his place, which I declined politely.

“Hey, Derek, It’s New Year Eve. You should be out getting fucked, not here being wasted.”

“Max, it's cool. I've decided never to have sex again. It would bring up a host of bad memories.”

“Are you sure? I could easily round up a few girls for you.”

“Thanks Man. Just the usual.” I watched the ball drop in Times Square on the TV, but by the time the bar closed, I was passed out.

I woke up the next morning completely naked in a guest room.

“Derek. You passed out so I took you home. The Wife is cleaning your clothes. Come down and have some breakfast."

“Thank you.”

I went down for breakfast and told Max about Nathan, it was the least I could do after all the help he had given me.

“You can always stay at our place if you want until you get back on your feet.”

I couldn’t be with this family and have them looking after me. “Thanks, but I'll get going. I need to find these answers for myself.”

The wife gave me my freshly laundered clothes. I was happy she didn’t ask about the blood stains and before long I was out of there.

I walked for days trying to figure out where to go from here.


I hitchhiked five hours north and found my way into a new college town. I smelled horrible. My clothes were dirty and smelled of garbage. My hair was long and filthy. I abandoned most of my gear in the backpack and it now carried mostly booze and drugs. It was the only thing that kept me going.

It was the middle of the day when I came to a campus and sat down on a bench. I opened another bottle of my best booze. Two men came over to the bench. One look like he was in his 20s and a young teenaged kid. They looked related.

“Hey? Can I help you?” Said the older one.

“What the fuck do you want?” I asked.

The older one covered his nephew’s ears. “I would like you keep the vulgarity to a minimum. I would also like to get you a cup of coffee and talk to you about the purpose for drinking in the middle of the day.”

The comment made me laugh. “Sit. I'm Derek. You sure want to talk about something like that around your brother?”

The kid spoke up, “I know all about drinking, sir.”

The older one looked up at me. “Shut up Rick. I'm Samuel; I'm the RA here at the college. This is my nephew Rick. For some reason he wants to be an RA like me.”

“Really? I wanted to talk to someone of authority. I need a room for a month, and since school is out for the summer, would I be allowed me to stay?” I had very little money left and although I became an alcoholic, I really would like to get cleaned up. It was one of the main reasons I came here.

The smell coming from me was clearly making Samuel feel sick. “I don’t have that level of authority, plus it would be pricey and you would have to be registered at this school.”

I smiled at him. “You don’t seem to be the type to follow rules. I just need a place to crash. I've been walking around for almost six months.”

Rick sat next to me, “Why have you been walking around so much?”

I ignored him.

“I would have to say no. Ask anybody they know, I follow the regulations here by the letter.” Samuel said.

“I am sure these kids must love the power hungry dictator they have running their dorm” Rick laughed at the comment.

“SHUT UP RICK! Not really. To be honest, I made a name for myself, and there's very little wrong doing happening on my floor. The problem is the kids call me the most horrible names.”

“As long as they obey the fucking rules, who gives a shit if they don’t like you?” 

“I do.”

I looked at him like he was dumb. “Then stop being a fucking asshole and allow your charges to have some fun. Drinking, sex and violence are a part of college life.”

Rick stared at his uncle. “YEAH!! STOP BEING A FUCKING ASSHOLE!”

Samuel ignored the comment and asked me, “You went to college?”

“I dropped out of my second year. Long story, but my boyfriend died that year and I couldn’t handle it.”

“That’s why you been walking around for months trying to escape?” Said Rick

“Yeah, I met some kid at a church who tried to explain that the accident wasn’t my fault.”

I didn’t want to discuss this horrible mess. Rick changed the subject.

“Tell me about him?”

"Who?" I said looking at the teen beside me.

“This boyfriend, what was he like?”

“He was my best friend in life. We dated for about four years. He was extremely smart, he aced everything in high school. All he could talk about was his brother.”

“What did he say?”

“That he liked to read a lot and be alone, and how he needed to experience the world. He would sometimes spend his nights when we started dating with his brother reading to him and telling him scary stories. The bond those two had, I would never want to take away.”

“It was special those two.” Rick was interested in this. “Me and my uncle are very close.”

Samuel nodded, trying to show some level of authority.

“Well, in our first year of dating I was able to see them play catch together, and they even allowed me to go on camping trips with them, and I was able to see them together and almost felt like I third wheel. Me and squirt got along so great too."

“Squirt?” Samuel asked.

“That’s what I called the younger brother. In the second year I got to spend a lot of time with him, he told me about this new computer game and he was great at it. He confided in me that he thought his older brother was changing.”

“Was he?” Rick, now engrossed in the story, asked.

“In retrospect, he was, we started to experience college life. It was hard on squirt, the kid idolized his brother and me for some reason. And seeing his brother change to the dark side would be hard on anyone.” I had a tear in my eye. It was a long time since I actually thought about Nathan, the booze took care of that.

“I can see how it is.”

I got up to leave.

“Where are you going?” They both asked.

“You said you didn’t have a room for me and I couldn’t afford it. So I'm going to go.” I took a swig of my drink.

Rick smiled, “We can work something out.”


Hope you enjoyed the story written by Andy with help from Big D.  You can COMMENT below as always or send an email directly to Andy at:   My friend enjoys writing for you like I do and would be thrilled if you could drop him an email about this chapter or any of his other writings, "Before They Roomed Together".