Corey’s Meltdown - Part One

Posted:   September 17, 2011

Another couple of Chapters written by Big 'D'.  It is written from Corey's point of view.  Hope you will enjoy what he was written for you.

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I was just coming back from an awesome practice with the guys. I always had such a great time with Kris and Colt when we were working out or playing sports. As much as I love Matt there are just some things that he and I can’t connect over and sports is one of them. Plus I can never get enough of seeing Kris and Colt topless and covered in sweat. Those two are so sexy, in fact so are most of my friends, Scott especially, with his hot swimmers body.

We entered our dorm room with smiles on our faces and were laughing and joking when Matt pulled me in to his bedroom.

“Corey… ummm… exactly when do you think you’ll get around to studying?  You know you can’t do it all the night before a test.”

“I will but let me shower first,” I said. There goes the buzz I had from hanging with the guys. “Shit, I’m barely in the fucking door and you want to confront me about my studying.”

Matt reached up and pulled me in for a kiss but I really didn’t want to kiss him at that moment in time. He was always on my ass about one thing or another. I can never fucking win.

“I love you so much.  I want us to have a better life in five years.  If you don’t…” he said, but I cut him off.

“Well… let me get my fucking books and start right now!”

Matt sat down on his bed with tears in his eyes. Oh here we go again, little Matt cries when he doesn’t get his own way. He can be so emotional and moody at times, it’s so tiring.

“I just wanted you… fuck it Corey!  Go shower!  Sorry I even mentioned it!” He said through his tears.

“No, you’re not.  You love controlling me.  Bitch, I have to say one thing… you can’t fucking control me!” I screamed, losing it. Sometimes I swear it’s like he thinks he fucking owns me rather than me being his boyfriend, being equals in a relationship.

“Dammit Corey, I just asked a simple question!” He said, losing a bit of his cool himself.

“Fucking simple question my ass!  Next thing you’ll wanna keep me from playing football!” Then I’ll really fucking lose it.

“I haven’t said shit about that.  I’m glad you are!  I was concerned!”

“Don’t be motherfucker!  I can handle this shit!” I said, moving toward him to make my point that I wouldn’t back down.

“Good luck there!”

There was no point even talking to Matt when he was like that. Nothing I could say would make him think he was anything but right. It’s always the same. Instead of getting even further in to an argument I turned away from him and walked out of the room.

Kris and Scott were looking at me as I entered the living area.

“What?” I asked, maybe a little too harshly.

“Erm… we heard you yelling,” Scott said.

“Is there are problem?” Kris asked.

“Yeah, your fucking little buddy has just had a go at me the minute I walked in the door. Nothing I do is good enough for him. You heard what he said when we were at Scott’s. He still fucking thinks the same now and I don’t think that will ever change, so what’s the point?” I said, my blood boiling as I walked into the bathroom, needing to shower, not only to wash off the sweat but also to wash of the feeling of being Matt’s property or just some piece of meat.

Colt had just come out of the shower when I stepped in and quickly washed myself before going to my room to get dried and dressed. Soon after Kris showered he joined us.

“Corey, please come with me so we can sort this out.” Kris said, rubbing his towel over his hard abs.

“What’s the point?” I asked, knowing it wouldn’t make any difference.

“Because it’s not just you it affects. Me and Colt have to live here too. Please, just give it a shot.” Kris said, wrapping his towel around his waist.

I was still pissed off but I decided to give them the benefit of the doubt so I stood up and followed Kris and Colt to Kris and Matt’s room where we all took a seat on Kris’ bed. I noticed Matt looking at me but I didn’t want to make eye contact.

“Guys, let’s get really serious here for one second.  Matt has made a great point on how we need to start buckling down and study…” Kris started. I just fucking knew he’d take Matt’s side.

“You know fuck this,” I said, my anger bubbling back to the surface. “I’ve had my lecture. I need to be studying to please my boyfriend and meet his lofty goddamn expectations.”

I stood to leave but Kris stopped me.

“Sit your fucking ass down right now, Corey!” Kris said. “Tell me when have you cracked a book?”

“You know Kris it’s bad enough for Matt to be on my ass.   Now you wanna be on my ass too!” I almost screamed. Who the fuck does Kris think he is?  “I’ll be in my room studying!”

“No!  We’re in this shit together!” Kris said.

What a fucking joke! No we’re not, it’s always the same, Matt is in charge of everything, hell, I even let him fuck Kris and all I get is shit for letting him do something he’s wanted to do for years. I’m such a terrible boyfriend, aren’t I?

Looking over to see Kris staring at me, I lost it. His fucking smug face just bugged the hell out of me and all I could see what the image in my head of him begging Matt to fuck the cum out of him. I stood and moved toward Kris, my hand clenching into a fist.

“You wanna fucking fight about this shit? I’ve heard all I want!” I said through clenched teeth.

“Stop it right now!” Matt screamed. He jumped to his feet to get between us before anything could kick off. He probably wanted to protect Kris more than me. “Corey, leave!  We’ll do this with or without you.”

“Fine!” I said, finally seeing where I stood in all of this. It was always Matt, Kris and Corey, in that order. I was always lower than those two and I would never measure up to Kris in Matt’s eyes. That was all I could take. I left the room, slamming the door behind me.

I went straight to my room and slammed that door too, but they probably wouldn’t have heard me. Kris and Colt were probably too busy sucking up to Matt, making him feel better and making me out to be some kind of asshole. Yes, because I’ve done nothing but love Matt this year, have I?

My blood was boiling as I rummaged through my bag and found one of my text books. I threw it on my desk and sat down to actually study from it. I didn’t need Matt to tell me to study and I was going to prove to him that I don’t need him to be on my ass every day to make me do things and to make sure I get good grades. I can do it myself without him smothering me.

I tried to concentrate but all I could think about was Matt and how he never wanted me to just have fun or be myself. I was always supposed to bend to his will and be part of Matt and Corey. It was like Corey as a man no longer existed if Matt wasn’t around, just like how he didn’t seem to like me spending time with the guys if he wasn’t around. We were always supposed to be together.

In my frustration I closed the book and threw it down on the desk. I wouldn’t take anything in anyway. I walked over and collapsed on my bed, burying my head in my pillow. I just wanted to scream.

Matt did come knocking on the door wanting to talk but I just told him to go. I didn’t want to talk to him until there was something worth saying, and right now I knew it would lead to an argument, which would only make things worse.

Colt came to the room to get changed and said they were heading out to get some food. I could tell he wanted me to go with them but I wasn’t in the mood for pretending to be happy around whoever ended up going to eat; with Kris around you never knew how many people would show up, so I told him I’d get my own food and they could go without me. Colt actually looked concerned and I could tell he wanted to say something but instead he just nodded silently and left the room.

I heard the main door to the dorm close about ten minutes later, so I got up and went to grab a quick bite to eat, making sure I avoided anyone who would want to speak. I also made sure I got back to the room before the others, closing my bedroom door behind me. I wasn’t going to sit out there and wait for them to come back and try to get me to say sorry to Matt. It wasn’t always that simple.

I stayed in my room a little while longer after I heard them come back. They were sitting in the living area chatting and probably watching TV. The only time I left the room was to go to the bathroom and grab a bottle of water from the fridge.

I briefly spoke with Kris and Colt but I couldn’t so much as look at Matt, let alone talk to him. I just knew that if we started talking it would blow up, and I wasn’t ready to deal with him or with Kris or Colt jumping to his defense like they always seemed to do. In their eyes Matt could do no wrong. Maybe I had made a mistake agreeing to live with them this year instead of being able to get away from it all like I had been able to last year. Maybe I should try to swap rooms with Scott or someone else.

After our brief chat, I went back to my room and heard the guys talking for a while longer before I fell asleep. I didn’t even wake up when Colt came in to go to sleep.

When I woke up in the morning I realised that I usually showered with Matt but that wasn’t going to happen. I moved toward the bathroom and heard the shower already running so I went back to my room, leaving the door open a crack until I heard Matt come out of the bathroom, having finished his shower.

He tried to talk to me again as I walked from my room to the bathroom but I still had nothing to say to him so I kept quiet and entered the bathroom, locking the door behind me so no one could come in. I just wanted some time alone to just be by myself and to think about everything that had happened.

The warm water felt great on my body, running over my hard muscles as I soaped myself up, wishing someone was in the shower with me, that my hands that were rubbing my pecs and abs belonged to someone else. The strange thing was I didn’t see those hands as belonging to Matt they belonged to some other nameless, faceless guy who was running his hands all over my body.

My dick was so hard and I realised that I was horny after not so much as thinking of stroking my cock or fucking anyone since long before the fight. I kept imagining some hot guy having his arms wrapped around me, running his hands all over my body and stroking my cock as I jerked off and quickly came all over the shower wall. It was such a powerful orgasm. I wondered how it would feel if I made that fantasy become a reality.

I got out of the shower, dried myself off and got dressed, spiking up my blond hair to look really hot. I admired myself in the mirror for a moment, actually wondering how many other people admired my looks and my body. Was I missing out by being with Matt?

I didn’t let those thoughts weigh on my mind for too long because I had a class to get to. When I was there it was like I had a new lease on life and I took in more of what the professor said than I think I ever had during a class throughout the first year.

I wasn’t looking forward to my next class though because it was with Matt. Arriving at the classroom I made sure not to sit near him so that I wouldn’t be distracted, but no matter what I did I couldn’t get rid of the feeling that he was constantly watching me. I kept looking over toward him and every time I looked his way he was looking mine, his eyes seemingly on me for the entire duration of the class. He just couldn’t help himself.

When class finished I was walking out of the classroom, making my way down the hall when Matt grabbed me by the arm.

“Do you wanna talk?” he asked.

“I’ll talk when I have something to say to you,” I said, with anger showing in my voice. Why couldn’t he leave me alone for just a little while?

“Corey, I’m sorry.  I don’t know how many times I have to say it.”

I felt words bubbling up inside me but I still didn’t want to get in to an argument with him, because all he would do is cry and make me feel bad, so I turned away from him and walked in the opposite direction.

I needed to go back to the dorm but I didn’t want to walk there with Matt so I took a scenic route and made sure he would get there before me. I was right, he did arrive before me, but it might have been a mistake because it was almost as if he was waiting for me. I just walked past him to my room and got changed for work. The whole world couldn’t stop for Matt; I still had a job to go to.

As I left for work Matt said goodbye and told me that he loved me. I just wasn’t interested so I grunted in reply and walked out the door, slamming it behind me a little harder than intended, even though I wanted to drive a point home.

Work was great though. I was on my own, just doing my thing, chatting to the guys I worked with or those who came to work out, helping some of them with their sets and giving some of the new freshmen advice on how to work their bodies so they would end up with a physique like mine, which seemed to be quite a hit with some of the guys. That is how life should be.

I finished work feeling great. I grabbed a bite to eat and then headed back to the room. I quickly spoke to Kris and Colt, catching up with them on their day, but I still didn’t speak to Matt and this time he didn’t try talking to me either, which made my smile that much wider.

I used the bathroom quickly and then headed to my room, closing the door behind me. Thankfully no one bothered me but I was expecting one of them to come say something. I was able to relax after work and even got some studying done. I felt great.

That night I slept better than I had in a long time. It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders and I felt free to drift off into a dream world where I was having a great time hanging out with a bunch of guys every day before going to work at the rec center and then heading back to my room to fuck one in a long line of hot guys who were just waiting to feel my thick cock fucking their hot asses.

I woke up the next day feeling so refreshed. My classes flew by with me taking loads of notes and understanding everything we were taught. Not being with Matt was doing wonders for me. It really got me thinking about the future.

After my final class I headed back to the dorm, meeting Colt on the way. We had a nice chat and were laughing. Colt really was a great guy and I was happy to be rooming with him. I had such a big smile on my face but that soon changed when we entered the dorm and Matt was waiting for me, standing up from the sofa the moment he saw me come in.

“Corey, please let’s talk,” he said, taking a few steps toward me.

“Matt, I said I’d fucking talk when I was good and ready!  Can’t you get it in your thick head, we’re finished!” I shouted, meaning every word after the great time I’d been having.

“What?” Matt said in disbelief, it looked like he was on the verge of tears.

“I said we’re finished as far as I’m concerned,” I said, wanting him to hear and believe what I said.

“Ummm… excuse me but I’ll just leave and let you two talk, alright?” Colt said, leaving us. He really was a great guy.

Matt waited until Colt was in our room before speaking, “so just over some stupid petty argument you want to throw a year just out the door, huh?”

“It would do me and you a lot of good if we started seeing other people,” I said, thinking back to my jerk off session in the shower. Then I thought about how much Matt had enjoyed fucking Kris and thought maybe he would agree. “You can be with Kris all you want.”

“Is that what this is really about?” he asked.

“Ummmm… you did seem to enjoy fucking him,” I replied, chuckling inside that he thought this was just about him and Kris. Everything revolves around those two.

“I knew it.  I knew it would come back and bite me squarely in the ass!  You didn’t seem to mind when Kris had his dick buried in you earlier this year, or did you forget about that? It’s not just me who fucked him! And do you know what amazes me the most? You suggested it!”

He was right. Kris had fucked me and it felt amazing. I wanted to experience things like that again, being fucked by a hot guy, even if just for one night.

“Yeah but you’ve wanted to fuck him forever!” I fired back.

“That may be true and I had several chances but I only did after I thought you were good with it.  You saw how it affected me!”

“Come off of it, Matt!  You know you’d fuck him every night if you could,” I said, knowing how much Matt had wanted to fuck Kris since the day they met. His feelings wouldn’t just go away because he’d had his dick in Kris’ hot ass, those feelings were still there and we both knew it.

I just stared at Matt’s face but said nothing else, wanting to see if he had anything to say in reply. He seemed to be biting his lip, wanting to say something but holding back. Maybe there wouldn’t be as big an argument as I had seen coming.

He turned away from me and walked toward the door of his room. Before he went through the opening he turned back and looked at me. “Corey, I love you but I don’t guess it goes both ways,” he said, going in to his room and shutting the door.

It does go both ways, Matt, and I do love you, but I just can’t stay in a relationship where I feel controlled, where I feel like I’m always going to be second best because I will never live up to the image of perfection that Matt has created in his mind when it comes to Kris. I deserve to be everything to a guy and I don’t think that would ever be the case with Matt.

Even though I loved him and would have liked nothing more than to go in to his room, rip his clothes off and fuck his brains out, we both needed this break up. If he wanted to be with Kris he now had the chance. They had finally fucked and the door was open for them to be together, let’s see if they take advantage of the opportunity.

I went to my room and changed out of my clothes into my workout gear. Even though I was happy with what had happened between me and Matt I felt the need to go and work out some of my stress on the machines at the Rec.

That didn’t go to plan though. The buzz I’d had the night before when I was working had gone and all I could think about was Matt and what he’d said. I really did love him but at 19 I just didn’t want to feel like I was tied down. I’ve only had three dicks inside me my entire life and two of those were essentially one night stands; Kris and the guy who fucked me when Matt caught me cheating on him. At least this time I broke up with him first.

As hard as I tried I just couldn’t stop thinking about Matt, it was driving me mad. I needed to do something to take my mind off it and in the past there was only one thing that had worked so after I finished my workout I hopped into my car and headed off to the liquor store where I had been served before, managing to buy a six pack.

I drove back to campus and sat in my car, draining each can one by one. Slowly my thoughts turned from Matt toward such random things I knew I would never remember them later. Two guys running past the car screaming made me jump, spilling the beer all over myself. By that time I was already half gone and was cursing myself and the idiots who had spooked me and made me soak my t-shirt.

Finally around ten I finished the last of my beers, having drank all six, and in a haze I staggered back to the dorm, throwing the door open wide. The second I walked in the door I saw Matt’s eyes on me, looking me up and down, so disapprovingly. God I hated that.

I didn’t say a word, wanting to get away from him before he started on me for yet another reason I disappointed him. He already let me know what he really thinks when he got drunk at Scott’s. He showed me his true colors that night so why was I going to listen to his sorry ass now?

Reaching my room I shut the door, just wanting to be alone. I lay on my bed and all I could think about was how Matt was still out there thinking all those bad things about me. The beer hadn’t worked quite as well as I hoped it would.

I rolled over and reached under my bed to where my secret stash was. I pulled out a bottle of Jim Bean I’d been keeping for if I got desperate but I hadn’t needed it until now. I unscrewed the lid and started drinking straight from the bottle.

I must have passed out at some point because the next thing I knew was that I was waking up in my bed with a pounding headache. The bottle of Jim Bean was on my desk. Colt must have taken it out of my hand and put it there.

I tried to get up but it was like someone was using my skull as their personal drum and I had to lie back down, feeling a little queasy. I was remembering why I didn’t drink as much or as often as I had the night before. I felt like crap.

I couldn’t bring myself to get up, going back to sleep until well after midday when I all but crawled to the shower trying to wash away the throbbing in my head, but nothing worked, not the pills I took, not drinking water, nothing.

I couldn’t attend any classes that day with the way I felt, it was pointless. I lay on either my bed or the couch wallowing in my own self pity. I knew how much of an idiot I was and that it was totally self-induced. Thinking about it, though, I didn’t need to be told that from a smug Matt so I got up, got changed for work and headed out to grab a coffee before going to the Rec Center.

When I got to work I was actually feeling pretty good, the worst of the hangover having gone. I greeted my regular workmates and we had a good chat, getting ready for our shift before we went out and took care of the equipment and talked to some of the other students who had come to use the facilities. I loved my job.

A little while later when I was on my break I got a text on my phone. I sighed at first thinking it would be Matt trying to contact me again but was surprised to see it was Colt.

“Hey bro, hope you’re feeling ok today. Put the bottle on your desk for you. Kris and I are going to mine for the weekend to watch Chase and Tabor play. Matt’s gone home too so you’ll be on your own til Sunday. Make the most of it and take care.”

I smiled. I really did have a great roommate who cared for me a lot. I had really lucked out. I was lucky last year but Colt was more than I could ever have hoped for, and he was hot, that was always a bonus. I started to think about what it might be like to hook up with him if me and Matt were really done. I’d sucked Colt’s dick before and I loved it. Seeing it hard since we’d been rooming together only made me want to suck it again, and given the chance, I most definitely would.

Thinking about that also got me thinking about Scott and how I hadn’t fucked him, but how good I knew he would be in bed. There were so many possibilities outside of Matt, what was I really thinking of in trying to settle down?

Those thoughts had me hard and I had to will my cock to go soft again before I could go back out to the gym to carry on with my job. That was easier said than done though because no sooner had my cock gone down when it was threatening to spring back up again.

Having ended things with Matt and thinking about my other friends in such a way as I had been it was almost like my eyes had been opened to a new world. As I looked around I saw so many hot guys working out, even the guys I worked with who I’d never really looked at sexually before were hot to me.

After about ten minutes of ogling every hot guy in sight I was approached by one of the younger looking guys who was actually really hot, maybe a little on the skinny side, and he was pretty damn handsome too.

“Hi,” he said, nervously. “You work here, right?”

“Yeah, I do.” I replied. “I’m Corey.”

I put out my hand for him to shake and he quickly took it. I couldn’t be sure but it looked like he shivered as our hands touched and I certainly felt a little jolt of electricity travel up my arm too.

“I was wondering if you might be able to help me. I’m Charlie, by the way.”

“What can I do for you, Charlie?” I asked.

“Well…” he seemed really nervous. “I know I’m a bit too skinny and I’d like to put on a bit of muscle but I don’t really know how. I was hoping you could teach me some tricks.”

“Tricks?” I asked.

“Yeah, you have an amazing body, so you must have something up your sleeve beside those incredible arms.”

I looked at him with a smile after hearing his words and flexed my bicep for him. He had gone red and I noticed him shifting a little uncomfortably.

I reached out and put my hand on his shoulder. Smiling, I said, “It’s okay.”

He looked up at me with wide eyes then and I had to laugh.

“What?” he asked.

“Nothing. You’re just really cute when you’re nervous or embarrassed.” I said, softly grazing his cheek with my thumb. I really felt him shiver this time.

“For real?” he squeaked.

Without even really thinking I said, “For real… Look, I’m working ‘til late but if you wanna coming back to mine to hang out or something then come back here when we’re shutting up and we can do something. My roommates are all away for the weekend.”

I continued to look at Charlie. He couldn’t form any words so he just nodded and swallowed really hard. I laughed again and patted him on the back.

“In the mean time, lets get working on some of these muscles, shall we?” I asked, running my hand down his chest and squeezing his small biceps.

For the next 45 minutes I helped Charlie work out, going to other guys close by to check on them too when I knew Charlie was okay. He was a really enthusiastic guy and I knew that if he kept up that attitude he could do really well and end up with a really hot body, just like how Matt had done.

Shit! Why did I have to think of Matt? I closed my eyes briefly and the image of his hot body, slim but so toned and good to touch, came to mind. Fuck, how I missed that body.

When I opened my eyes to see Charlie looking at me I felt really guilty. It felt wrong the way I had flirted with him and pretty much set up a date with him. But then, why did it? I had broken up with Matt. I was single. Why should I be worried about what anyone would think? I could do what I wanted.

Keeping that in mind I kept working. Charlie finished his workout and went to shower before heading off. He said goodbye to me three times and I knew he would be back at the end of my shift. It was exciting to think a hot young college guy wanted to be with me, but I still felt those pangs of guilt creeping in and making me think twice about what I was doing.

Later on when I was finishing my shift and saying goodbye to the rest of the guys I saw someone hovering outside. Just as I suspected it was Charlie. He had come back and was waiting for me. I was a little surprised too by how confident and forward he was. Just a couple of weeks in to his life at college he was waiting around for a guy so he could go back to his dorm. I wish I had been so bold from the start, even if Matt and I did hook up pretty quickly.

I greeted him and told him to follow me. We headed toward my dorm but as we approached the building I got really nervous. As much as I wanted to take Charlie up to my room to see what might happen I didn’t want any of the other guys who lived on our floor to see. I felt as though I needed to keep him a secret so Matt wouldn’t find out about him. Why was I bothered about what Matt would think? I shouldn’t care.

We made it to my room and I quickly locked the door behind us to make sure no one could come in to find us. Charlie clearly saw me do that because he had a huge smile on his face and stepped forward to run his hands over my chest.

“You are so hot,” he breathed, rubbing my pecs. “I can’t wait to get you out of these clothes and see what’s underneath.”

He ran a hand up behind my head and pulled me in for a deep kiss. As his tongue probed my mouth his other hand slid down and took hold of my thick cock through my shorts.

Suddenly it all felt so wrong. What the fuck was I thinking?

Even though my dick was hard and wanted attention, I just couldn’t do it. I pulled back from the kiss and pushed his hand away from me.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, with tears in my eyes. All I could think about was Matt and how I had let him down. “I… I just can’t do it.”

The look on his face was pure disappointment but then he smiled. “I understand,” he said, nodding.

“I’m really sorry that I lead you on.” I said through my tears, feeling like such a moron for crying in front of this guy.

“What’s his name?” he asked, surprising me.

“Matt… How did you know?” I asked.

“Because it was too good to be true that a guy like you would be single and you didn’t really seem in to that kiss. You just sort of let me kiss you but you didn’t touch me or kiss me back.”

“I’m sorry. I thought I could go through with it because we’ve broken up, but I just can’t, it feels wrong.”

“Stop apologising,” he said softly. “You stopped it before we went any further so there’s no harm done.”

“Can we still be friends?” I asked, feeling pathetic as soon as the words were out of my mouth.

“Of course we can,” he said. “I still need you to show my sorry ass how I can get to be as hot as you so I have guys drooling over me in the gym like you do.”

I chuckled, unable to believe how cool this guy was being. I had led him on and then knocked him back and he was taking it all in his stride.

“Look, I’m gonna go, but I’ll see you again at the Rec some time.” Charlie said as he unlocked the door and left my room.

I felt so stupid and like such an asshole. I had been totally unfair on Matt, blowing up on him when he was only trying to help me, and then I had led on a really nice guy and probably made him hate me for being a total cock tease.

I sat down on the sofa and put my head in my hands, the tears still flowing. I was such a dick. I had such a good life, with an awesome roommate in Colt, a great friend in Kris, and an incredible, hot, sexy, smart boyfriend in Matt who loved me and who I loved too. I felt so alone but I knew there was nothing I could do.

Much like the night before, I went to my room and grabbed the bottle that was still on my desk, taking huge gulps, just drinking and drinking. As I sat down on my bed I realized I was still hard so I loaded up my computer, wanting to shoot a load. I started watching a porno I loved but as I watched what was happening on screen the two guys transformed into Matt and I and I so desperately wanted that to be us again. I stroked myself to an amazing climax and fell asleep on the bed.


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